I Don't Play Hurt by Alan Cohen
I am not a victim of the world I see.
- A Course in Miracles
I began to feel irritated when the limo driver was late. After a long flight on the eve of an intense book promotion tour, I was tired and anxious to get to my hotel. Finally the limo arrived and the driver emerged. He was a tall, husky African-American man who resembled a cross between George Forman and Goldfinger’s Oddjob. I decided not to get in his face.
Enroute the driver, Terry, apologized for being late because he had a minor fender bender on his way. When he asked me what I was doing in L.A., I told him I was promoting my new book, Why Your Life Sucks and What You Can Do About It. Terry chuckled, “I can use that book.”
A few minutes later I heard Terry reporting the mishap to his dispatcher over the 2-way radio. “Was there any damage to the car?” asked the dispatcher.
“None,” Terry answered curtly.
“Did you get hurt?” was the next question.
“Not really.”
After a silence, the dispatcher replied, “You know, there could be some cash in this for you.”
When I realized the dispatcher was suggesting that Terry file a false insurance claim, I awaited his response. A moment later he answered in a low, sober voice, “I don’t play hurt.”
Now there’s an affirmation to file in a conspicuous place: I don’t play hurt. That’s exactly the principle I’ve been striving to live and teach for my whole career. Stunned, I placed a hand on Terry’s shoulder and told him, “You don’t need my book, man you’re already living it.”
None of us can afford to play hurt. When you do, you undermine your true strength and live a lie. Don’t play small. Don’t act like a victim. Don’t seek rewards for pain. Be magnificent. Be powerful. If you are going to play any role, play strong and whole, for that’s who you truly are.
Are you playing hurt in any area of your life?
What would you be doing differently if you played whole and strong?
I am strong, whole, and empowered. I don’t play hurt.
Friday, February 19, 2010
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Reality Check: Whose Reality Is It Anyway? by Marilyn Jenett
Reality Check: Whose Reality Is It Anyway? by Marilyn Jenett
Today, President's Day in the United States , we commemorate the birthdays of the great American Presidents George Washington and Abraham Lincoln. Both men expressed a quality that represents our highest nature and finest character - that of honesty and truth. Most of us have heard the story of the young boy who chopped down his father's beloved cherry tree but could not lie about it - which meant more to his father than a thousand valuable trees. And Honest Abe earned his nickname as a young store clerk who would walk miles to return a few cents if he accidently short-changed a customer and who insisted on utmost integrity later in his law career.
In the spirit of honesty, I would like to address the idea of truth vs. lies in your life and consciousness with this chapter from my upcoming book...
Reality Check: Whose Reality Is It Anyway?
In the beginning of the Feel Free to Prosper program, I ask my students to explore and share their core feelings and beliefs about their relationship to money and prosperity.
Now, this is a REAL reality check -- or we might call this a prosperity reality check.
If you think that in some way life has stacked the odds against you, if you feel that there isn't a level playing field for success, if you feel challenged in your ability to succeed, then I strongly recommend that you not only read my words carefully in this chapter, but also review the biography at the end of the chapter -- the biography of a woman who, in my opinion, is one of the greatest inspirations of all time.
Whose Reality Is It Anyway?
So, let's say that you have discovered your core belief (or beliefs) about money and prosperity. Now what are we going to do about it?
Well, first I am going to tell you the important truth about those negative beliefs. The truth is . . . your beliefs are a lie. A lie.
The interesting part is that as long as you keep accepting those beliefs, they remain YOUR lie that colors and predicts your reality, so in essence they become YOUR truth. That is, what you believe to be true. Your life experience is the outcropping of your accepted (false) truth. Your circumstances and outer appearances only serve to perpetuate this "truth" and to further "prove" that it is so. And thus the lie keeps feeding itself. You are hypnotized.
Then, when you attempt to consider the possibility of abundance and success for yourself, that's when you feel like you are lying to yourself.
Well, I have news for you. Those beliefs that you have expressed are not at all related to the real you. They are not who you are. They do not represent the talents, the abilities, the qualities or the essence of the person that you are -- the real you.
They represent negative false beliefs that you acquired throughout your lifetime and that were instilled in your mind by others, even when you were very young. You unconsciously made those beliefs your own.
The nature of the subconscious mind is that it will create and produce for you according to the ideas it has accepted as reality.
The real you has access to all of the creative forces of the universe because you are an individualized expression of universal mind, infinite intelligence, God. That intelligence gave you your talents and abilities and also gave you the means to fulfill those talents and abilities.
So I Ask You . . . Whose Reality Is It Anyway?
How do you tune in and become who you really are?
The first step to victory is to recognize those false beliefs for what they are -- the lie. They are NOT the truth about you. They are the lie. The fact that you cannot attract money or clients or success in your business is a great big lie.
I would like to go back in time here...
One of my early students was owed quite a bit of money from a former employer and they had refused to pay for over a year. Any effort she made to collect failed. Then we met and she began the Feel Free to Prosper program. Shortly after the second lesson, she was able to get a mediation date in court. I prepared her for this welcome opportunity. At the court proceeding, the insurance company for the employer adamantly refused to pay, although my student carefully kept her cool and focused her attention on prosperity thoughts as the attorneys and judge interacted. The judge finally said he would take the ruling under submission until the following week, but it was obvious that the employer's representatives were not budging.
My student had to wait for an entire week and insecurities started to set in. Her core belief was that she was meant to struggle, that "winning" this ruling in her favor would be too good to be true. She said she kept hearing an inner voice telling her this.
Although I normally endorse using only positive words in our study and don't even like to use the word lie, I found myself spontaneously telling her that what she was hearing was that old subconscious "tape" playing over and over in her mind and that she must recognize it for what it was -- it was the lie! The truth was that she is a child of the Universe and entitled to all of the supply and abundance that she could have if she could keep her mind open to receive.
That did it for her. Whenever those old conditioned thoughts would come, she would remind herself that that was the lie and she would again become centered.
Here is the story in her own words as posted on the Feel Free to Prosper Network:
"Hello fellow financial coaching groupies!
"I had a productive week in regards to our lesson plans and tangible results. Shall I say more ???!
"When I saw Marilyn's announcement of the FFTP program, I just knew that it was the perfect pole vault to take me over the top. It was just a gut feeling. I am moving into a new phase of my career and Marilyn's insight and solid lesson plans were just the right distraction to bring me to the next level. And thus far it's succeeding. Without getting into too much mundane detail, I had a leftover challenge from an employer of more than one year ago. They owed me $$, refused to pay, and I was determined not to give back my income to them by walking away because there was a clear right and wrong issue here.
"Well, after a year, I finally got my 'day in court' so to speak (more of a mediation). What was exceptional is that I had just gotten Marilyn's second lesson and had gone over half of it when this happened. The day in court was long and arduous. Also exceptional was what I did with my time. I relied heavily on my affirmations, and during long periods of time when I was alone and the pressure was on, I developed a meditation that was inspired by Marilyn and our Lesson Two. I focused on an object and really felt, thought and visualized that I was a magnet for lots of money and that the magnetic energy that I was putting out there was getting stronger and stronger. When I got nervous, I would move back into that space of just concentrating on the magnetic energy I was giving out. When negative thoughts would trickle in, I would just tell myself that they are a 'lie' because they are! That was customized by Marilyn for me and was of enormous help.
Several days later, I found out that everything was settled and I got a big chunk o'money!! Now with that chapter behind me, I can clearly focus on my career goals in terms of financial success. I can't wait for the next lessons to unfold!
"Thank you, Marilyn!"
Now, here are some more truths about your negative beliefs - one or more of these may apply to you:
You are comfortable with them. After all, they are familiar, aren't they -- even if you weren't aware of what they specifically were, they have become "second nature," haven't they?
You might feel you are stuck with these beliefs -- there is nothing you can do about them so that you might as well make the best of it.
These beliefs might provide the excuse or justification for not moving forward, even succeeding.
You might feel that if you just keep going along like you are with these beliefs, that things will just get better somehow and you might have some lucky breaks to get you where you want to go.
None of the above factors will produce money and success for you. You must now make a conscious choice to become aware of your false beliefs and recognize them for what they are -- blatant false beliefs. Lies that you no longer wish to apply to your life and that in no way serve you.
You must take the upper hand and make a stand for what you want to create in your life. It is a choice. It must no longer be an unconscious choice. It must be a conscious choice and you must now become the boss. You and only you must decide...
Whose Reality Is It Anyway?
If the following biography does not touch and inspire you in some way, then I will admit that you are beyond the scope of my abilities as a mentor. But I am certain you will understand why I am including this . . .
"Helen Keller (1880 - 1968), is an outstanding example of a person who conquered physical disabilities. A serious illness, which her doctor called 'acute congestion of the stomach and brain,' destroyed her sight and hearing at the age of about 1 ½. Because of this, she could not speak and was entirely shut off from the world. But she rose above her disabilities to gain international fame and to help disabled people live fuller lives.
"For almost five years, she grew up, as she later said, 'wild and unruly, giggling and chuckling to express pleasure; kicking, scratching, uttering the choked screams of the deaf -- mute to indicate the opposite.' Then Helen's father took her to Alexander Graham Bell. He advised Keller to write to the Perkins Institution for the Blind in Boston (now Perkins School for the Blind in Watertown , Massachusetts ). Shortly before the child was 7, Anne Sullivan arrived from Boston to teach her. Sullivan had been nearly blind during childhood, but surgery in 1881 and 1887 partially restored her sight. She later married John A. Macy, but she remained with Helen Keller until her death. Then Mary Agnes 'Polly' Thomson, who had been Keller's secretary, took Sullivan's place.
"She Learns to Write. Sullivan was able to make contact with the girl's mind through the sense of touch. She used a manual alphabet by which she spelled out words on Helen's hand. Gradually, the child was able to connect words with objects. Once she understood, her progress was rapid. Within three years, she knew the alphabet and could read and write in Braille.
"She Learns to Speak. Until she was 10 years old, Keller could talk only with sign language. She decided she would learn to speak and took lessons from a teacher of the deaf. By the time she was 16, she could communicate well enough to go to preparatory school and to college. She chose Radcliffe, from which she graduated in 1904 with honors. Sullivan stayed with her through these years, interpreting lectures and class discussions for her.
"She Helps Others. After college, Keller became concerned with the conditions of the blind and the deaf -- blind. She became active on the staffs of the American Foundation for the Blind and of the American Foundation for Overseas Blind. She appeared before legislatures, gave lectures, and wrote many books and articles. She started the Helen Keller Endowment Fund and asked for funds from wealthy people.
"Keller became especially interested in bettering conditions for the blind in developing and war -- ravaged nations. An enthusiastic and untiring traveler, she lectured in their behalf in over 25 nations throughout the world. During World War II (1939-1945), Keller worked with soldiers who had been blinded in the war. Wherever she appeared, she brought new courage to blind people.
"Keller received many awards of great distinction. They included the Chevalier's ribbon of the French Legion of Honor, the Alumni Achievement Award of Radcliffe College, and decorations from many governments.
"Keller's books have been translated into more than 50 languages. They include The Story of My Life (1902); Optimism (1903); The World I Live In (1908); The Song of the Stone Wall (1910); Out of the Dark (1913); My Religion (1929); and Midstream: My Later Life (1930). Teacher (1955) tells of Sullivan. The motion picture Helen Keller in Her Story told the story of Keller's life. The play The Miracle Worker (1959) and its motion-picture adaptation (1962) described how Sullivan made contact with Keller through the sense of touch. Helen Adams Keller was born on June 27, 1880, in Tuscumbia , Alabama . She died on June 1, 1968." [1]
Again I Ask...Whose Reality Is It Anyway?
~ Marilyn
Today, President's Day in the United States , we commemorate the birthdays of the great American Presidents George Washington and Abraham Lincoln. Both men expressed a quality that represents our highest nature and finest character - that of honesty and truth. Most of us have heard the story of the young boy who chopped down his father's beloved cherry tree but could not lie about it - which meant more to his father than a thousand valuable trees. And Honest Abe earned his nickname as a young store clerk who would walk miles to return a few cents if he accidently short-changed a customer and who insisted on utmost integrity later in his law career.
In the spirit of honesty, I would like to address the idea of truth vs. lies in your life and consciousness with this chapter from my upcoming book...
Reality Check: Whose Reality Is It Anyway?
In the beginning of the Feel Free to Prosper program, I ask my students to explore and share their core feelings and beliefs about their relationship to money and prosperity.
Now, this is a REAL reality check -- or we might call this a prosperity reality check.
If you think that in some way life has stacked the odds against you, if you feel that there isn't a level playing field for success, if you feel challenged in your ability to succeed, then I strongly recommend that you not only read my words carefully in this chapter, but also review the biography at the end of the chapter -- the biography of a woman who, in my opinion, is one of the greatest inspirations of all time.
Whose Reality Is It Anyway?
So, let's say that you have discovered your core belief (or beliefs) about money and prosperity. Now what are we going to do about it?
Well, first I am going to tell you the important truth about those negative beliefs. The truth is . . . your beliefs are a lie. A lie.
The interesting part is that as long as you keep accepting those beliefs, they remain YOUR lie that colors and predicts your reality, so in essence they become YOUR truth. That is, what you believe to be true. Your life experience is the outcropping of your accepted (false) truth. Your circumstances and outer appearances only serve to perpetuate this "truth" and to further "prove" that it is so. And thus the lie keeps feeding itself. You are hypnotized.
Then, when you attempt to consider the possibility of abundance and success for yourself, that's when you feel like you are lying to yourself.
Well, I have news for you. Those beliefs that you have expressed are not at all related to the real you. They are not who you are. They do not represent the talents, the abilities, the qualities or the essence of the person that you are -- the real you.
They represent negative false beliefs that you acquired throughout your lifetime and that were instilled in your mind by others, even when you were very young. You unconsciously made those beliefs your own.
The nature of the subconscious mind is that it will create and produce for you according to the ideas it has accepted as reality.
The real you has access to all of the creative forces of the universe because you are an individualized expression of universal mind, infinite intelligence, God. That intelligence gave you your talents and abilities and also gave you the means to fulfill those talents and abilities.
So I Ask You . . . Whose Reality Is It Anyway?
How do you tune in and become who you really are?
The first step to victory is to recognize those false beliefs for what they are -- the lie. They are NOT the truth about you. They are the lie. The fact that you cannot attract money or clients or success in your business is a great big lie.
I would like to go back in time here...
One of my early students was owed quite a bit of money from a former employer and they had refused to pay for over a year. Any effort she made to collect failed. Then we met and she began the Feel Free to Prosper program. Shortly after the second lesson, she was able to get a mediation date in court. I prepared her for this welcome opportunity. At the court proceeding, the insurance company for the employer adamantly refused to pay, although my student carefully kept her cool and focused her attention on prosperity thoughts as the attorneys and judge interacted. The judge finally said he would take the ruling under submission until the following week, but it was obvious that the employer's representatives were not budging.
My student had to wait for an entire week and insecurities started to set in. Her core belief was that she was meant to struggle, that "winning" this ruling in her favor would be too good to be true. She said she kept hearing an inner voice telling her this.
Although I normally endorse using only positive words in our study and don't even like to use the word lie, I found myself spontaneously telling her that what she was hearing was that old subconscious "tape" playing over and over in her mind and that she must recognize it for what it was -- it was the lie! The truth was that she is a child of the Universe and entitled to all of the supply and abundance that she could have if she could keep her mind open to receive.
That did it for her. Whenever those old conditioned thoughts would come, she would remind herself that that was the lie and she would again become centered.
Here is the story in her own words as posted on the Feel Free to Prosper Network:
"Hello fellow financial coaching groupies!
"I had a productive week in regards to our lesson plans and tangible results. Shall I say more ???!
"When I saw Marilyn's announcement of the FFTP program, I just knew that it was the perfect pole vault to take me over the top. It was just a gut feeling. I am moving into a new phase of my career and Marilyn's insight and solid lesson plans were just the right distraction to bring me to the next level. And thus far it's succeeding. Without getting into too much mundane detail, I had a leftover challenge from an employer of more than one year ago. They owed me $$, refused to pay, and I was determined not to give back my income to them by walking away because there was a clear right and wrong issue here.
"Well, after a year, I finally got my 'day in court' so to speak (more of a mediation). What was exceptional is that I had just gotten Marilyn's second lesson and had gone over half of it when this happened. The day in court was long and arduous. Also exceptional was what I did with my time. I relied heavily on my affirmations, and during long periods of time when I was alone and the pressure was on, I developed a meditation that was inspired by Marilyn and our Lesson Two. I focused on an object and really felt, thought and visualized that I was a magnet for lots of money and that the magnetic energy that I was putting out there was getting stronger and stronger. When I got nervous, I would move back into that space of just concentrating on the magnetic energy I was giving out. When negative thoughts would trickle in, I would just tell myself that they are a 'lie' because they are! That was customized by Marilyn for me and was of enormous help.
Several days later, I found out that everything was settled and I got a big chunk o'money!! Now with that chapter behind me, I can clearly focus on my career goals in terms of financial success. I can't wait for the next lessons to unfold!
"Thank you, Marilyn!"
Now, here are some more truths about your negative beliefs - one or more of these may apply to you:
You are comfortable with them. After all, they are familiar, aren't they -- even if you weren't aware of what they specifically were, they have become "second nature," haven't they?
You might feel you are stuck with these beliefs -- there is nothing you can do about them so that you might as well make the best of it.
These beliefs might provide the excuse or justification for not moving forward, even succeeding.
You might feel that if you just keep going along like you are with these beliefs, that things will just get better somehow and you might have some lucky breaks to get you where you want to go.
None of the above factors will produce money and success for you. You must now make a conscious choice to become aware of your false beliefs and recognize them for what they are -- blatant false beliefs. Lies that you no longer wish to apply to your life and that in no way serve you.
You must take the upper hand and make a stand for what you want to create in your life. It is a choice. It must no longer be an unconscious choice. It must be a conscious choice and you must now become the boss. You and only you must decide...
Whose Reality Is It Anyway?
If the following biography does not touch and inspire you in some way, then I will admit that you are beyond the scope of my abilities as a mentor. But I am certain you will understand why I am including this . . .
"Helen Keller (1880 - 1968), is an outstanding example of a person who conquered physical disabilities. A serious illness, which her doctor called 'acute congestion of the stomach and brain,' destroyed her sight and hearing at the age of about 1 ½. Because of this, she could not speak and was entirely shut off from the world. But she rose above her disabilities to gain international fame and to help disabled people live fuller lives.
"For almost five years, she grew up, as she later said, 'wild and unruly, giggling and chuckling to express pleasure; kicking, scratching, uttering the choked screams of the deaf -- mute to indicate the opposite.' Then Helen's father took her to Alexander Graham Bell. He advised Keller to write to the Perkins Institution for the Blind in Boston (now Perkins School for the Blind in Watertown , Massachusetts ). Shortly before the child was 7, Anne Sullivan arrived from Boston to teach her. Sullivan had been nearly blind during childhood, but surgery in 1881 and 1887 partially restored her sight. She later married John A. Macy, but she remained with Helen Keller until her death. Then Mary Agnes 'Polly' Thomson, who had been Keller's secretary, took Sullivan's place.
"She Learns to Write. Sullivan was able to make contact with the girl's mind through the sense of touch. She used a manual alphabet by which she spelled out words on Helen's hand. Gradually, the child was able to connect words with objects. Once she understood, her progress was rapid. Within three years, she knew the alphabet and could read and write in Braille.
"She Learns to Speak. Until she was 10 years old, Keller could talk only with sign language. She decided she would learn to speak and took lessons from a teacher of the deaf. By the time she was 16, she could communicate well enough to go to preparatory school and to college. She chose Radcliffe, from which she graduated in 1904 with honors. Sullivan stayed with her through these years, interpreting lectures and class discussions for her.
"She Helps Others. After college, Keller became concerned with the conditions of the blind and the deaf -- blind. She became active on the staffs of the American Foundation for the Blind and of the American Foundation for Overseas Blind. She appeared before legislatures, gave lectures, and wrote many books and articles. She started the Helen Keller Endowment Fund and asked for funds from wealthy people.
"Keller became especially interested in bettering conditions for the blind in developing and war -- ravaged nations. An enthusiastic and untiring traveler, she lectured in their behalf in over 25 nations throughout the world. During World War II (1939-1945), Keller worked with soldiers who had been blinded in the war. Wherever she appeared, she brought new courage to blind people.
"Keller received many awards of great distinction. They included the Chevalier's ribbon of the French Legion of Honor, the Alumni Achievement Award of Radcliffe College, and decorations from many governments.
"Keller's books have been translated into more than 50 languages. They include The Story of My Life (1902); Optimism (1903); The World I Live In (1908); The Song of the Stone Wall (1910); Out of the Dark (1913); My Religion (1929); and Midstream: My Later Life (1930). Teacher (1955) tells of Sullivan. The motion picture Helen Keller in Her Story told the story of Keller's life. The play The Miracle Worker (1959) and its motion-picture adaptation (1962) described how Sullivan made contact with Keller through the sense of touch. Helen Adams Keller was born on June 27, 1880, in Tuscumbia , Alabama . She died on June 1, 1968." [1]
Again I Ask...Whose Reality Is It Anyway?
~ Marilyn
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